Creating My Life

Things have been rough around here, especially financially. Moving to Seattle took a lot of out of us, and we have very little family support to boot. Living in our tiny apartment costs more than it's worth. Debt collectors keep calling me to remind me I owe them money for being in the hospital last year, our car needs repairs, I need a job that pays at least 800 dollars a week, but I can only work from home due to the pain levels I am in, and I am opening my very own online shop with things I make with my own hands.

Life has been rather stressful you might say.

In a fair world I could just make art for a living and live off that. But I'm not stupid.  I know I need to find something real soon, because things cannot go on this way. Having people nag me about it only makes me angry and gets nothing solved. I know what's going on. I'm not blind to it. I know somehow we need money, and I don't want to end up in the hospital again because I tried to do a job in the outside world. I can't get disability in this country because I have never had a job here. I spent my working years in Canada. I live in the weirdest grey area you can get, trying to scrounge what I can where I can. I might have to start a fundraiser, but I don't like begging for money. I want to earn it. It's why I made my business to begin with. It's something I can offer in exchange for that paper shit. I am not broken because I have chronic illness. I just have to find alternative ways to get funds. If anyone has helpful suggestions on what I can do to supplement the art gig, please let me know. Things are getting desperate.

On the positive side of things: I am happy to report I am days away from my shop Marrow Minded Crafts opening! I am nervous, because anything like this takes so much work to get off the ground, but I am happy as well. I get to do something I enjoy doing, that makes others happy! YES! I love my little shop, and I am happy with all the commissions I've made for others. Now it's time to branch out. Making things makes me feel empowered and creative. When I think of something I want to try, I just do it now, instead of agonizing about it. Maybe I am just done dreaming. Dreaming is important, but don't get stuck doing only that. Dreams take work. You need to commit to your dreams, and even if it takes years in the making, don't give up.

Things are going to get better. Because I demand it. #dontfuckwiththequeen